They say how a person treats a waiter says a lot about his or her character, so how do celebrities treat the men and women charged with serving them? One Los Angeles server reveals who’s nice and who’s nasty in his hilarious blog, The Bitter Waiter. Here’s what he has to say about some of the biggest names in Hollywood.
David Hasselhoff – “If you took a dozen monkeys, gave them each a hit of acid, dressed them in medieval clothing and threw them a collective birthday party at a Mexican restaurant, that sight would still appear more lucid than waiting on David Hasselhoff.”
Gwyneth Paltrow – “Gwyneth, from my limited experience, is gracious, personable, and wickedly funny. She's the kind of girl who makes you want to pull up a chair and enjoy some macrobiotic treats and dark beer in her presence.”
Katie Holmes – “I have killed cockroaches at work with more warmth and personality than Katie Holmes.”
Evangeline Lilly - “She's even more gorgeous in person, exceptionally low-maintenance, witty and engaging, and radiantly warm and friendly.”
Julia Roberts – “If she's America's sweetheart, then America needs to spend an evening serving her…each time I took her order, she rolled her eyes at me and whispered to her husband, who communicated the order to me. Her husband seemed mildly nice enough, but she was a diva of the worst kind - one who finds herself too good to talk to the rabble.”
Kristen Bell – “I love me some Veronica Mars/Gossip Girl, and Bell is both delightful and a good tipper, but the gaggle of obnoxious fan boys at her table made me roll my eyes so many times I thought someone would have to shove a spoon down my throat.”
Teri Hatcher – “The speed of the ceiling fan, the temperature of her soup, the volume of my voice, the type of music playing in the background, the lack of blue corn tortilla chips, the size of the silverware, the quality of toilet paper in the bathroom -- this crazy loon complained about EVERYTHING.”
Jennifer Garner – “Her food order is simple. Her smile makes you feel like you're her best friend. Her laughter solidifies your choice to be a comedic actor (or at least encourages you to prolong the delusion).
And her tip? Her tip could have paid half my rent.”
Check out The Bitter Waiter to find out who else is a pleasure, or pain, to wait on.
Photo: morgueFile (Not the Bitter Waiter)